Most Random Thing Uve Ever Found
This one time I was just sleeping my bed, minding my own business, when all of a sudden I was aroused (woken up you sickoes, get your mind out fo the gutter) by a freaking loud crash outside. I'm talking a real hulabaloo. Anyway, I dashed to my window and, like, opened it and stuff and used a little mirror (I always keep one handy) to get a nice view of the roof and what to my wondering eyes should appear but this fat little queermo jacking off eight reindeer. I think he saw that I had caught him, cause his cheeks turned all rosy like he was real embarrassed, and he ran to the fucking chimney (he must have been damn tripped out to be on my roof in the first place, poor bastard) and I swear to God he actually squeezed down into my living room, presumably to kill me and thus protect his twisted little secret. So I shot him and called the cops to cart his dead ass away. Yeah, I thought that was a bit random.